Dwell or Swell

Esteem

I've been down in the dumps guys! I need a pick me up. Usually yoga and some friend time can get me back on track. This time I just feel like I'm on a roll a coaster. While scrolling through Pinterest I came across this artwork and immediately felt connected to it. Sad? Yes, but even as an adult we still have self esteem issues. They just tend to warp into other things. Instead of being self conscious about your body you are always judging your career or material items like cars, and other things based on those around you. Instead of focusing on building yourself, you're too busy watching someone else climb to new heights, through their career or some grand adventure. There's nothing wrong with this, we all do it. The trick is not to fall into it for years.

My self esteem issues fluctuate. There are times when I am disappointed in my career and other times I am thankful for the people I have met along the way and know I wouldn't have met them otherwise. Or some of the things I have experienced. This week's issues are the things people say to me.

Everyone get's their feelings hurt. That's normal. Maybe you get a little embarrassed but you learn from your mistakes. Sometimes we can't help who we are though. Or the people doing the talking don't realize what they are saying. My own personal issue is dwelling. I like to repeat what people say to me over and over again in my head. My mind manipulates what they say and maximizes it, putting more meaning into their words. They do not come right out and tell me they hate me, but that is what I hear. Angry words said aloud turn into sad thoughts and memories later.

My husband and I are different in many ways. I dwell on things and he likes to keep the past in the past. I am my own worst enemy. In truth, we all are. We all can make anything happen if we would only get out of our own way. Fear is a common self esteem factor. What if that? What if this? I stop and look both ways. My husband glances left and right and jumps. I think that's why we do so well together. Because I can fester and dwell, repeating things in my head again and again, finally tell my husband how I heard it and what it has done to me mentally and he can turn around and say screw them and move on. He shrugs it off, tells me what I need to hear and we keep going.

But the words are still in my head. The tone in which it was said is still warm from the hot poker it was imprinted with. They still sting my eyes when I think of them.

How am I going to solve my slump?

1) Remember that I can not change those around me. They will always be who they are no matter how much I try to change for them.

2) Remember that the things they say aren't who I am.

3) Remember that I am stronger than their words.

4) Remember they are just words meant in that moment and they do not reflect the person as a whole.

5) Remember that I am who I am and that is good enough for me.

On that last note, even though I am in a slump, I should always want to grow as a person. That is what keeps us moving forward. Though someone may say things to drag me down, I know that only I can lift myself up. If you are feeling negative today or just want a little motivation for the week, I inserted a video of one of my favorite speakers. Les Brown. He will tell you how it is. He's honest, but he will get your thoughts turning in another direction. That's where I want to be today. We're not turning around looking at what happened yesterday, the week before or last month. We're moving forward. 

As always 

Thanks for Reading 

Hope you have a Sweeter Day than Yesterday

Self Pity Holding You Back

So when other people aren't dragging us down, what holds us back from reaching our goals? Us! As in me or the great I can't. I recently read an article titled, 9 Ways Mentally Strong People Prevent Self-Pity From Sabotaging Their Success. Super long name but the article was interesting. It makes sense that successful and/or happy people are the way they are because of their mindset. They see things differently. They don't dwell and they don't complain. They look at what's in front of them and push through, instead of trying to go around it or even turn around and take the easier path.

So this week's positive thought is SNAP OUT OF IT. :) We all have bad days and bad times, but it's how we handle those situations that make us or break us.

Bad days and time periods are always going to be in our life. They are always going to pop up when you don't want them too. But if you just sit back and say well there's nothing I can do then you're right, nothing will get done. Nothing will ever change. Nothing will ever get better. When you look at your situation and think it will never get better then it won't because you said it won't. Because you didn't look at your situation and raise to the challenge. 

Not going to lie, I don't like my current situation. I live in an area where I don't know anyone. I work from home so I meet no one and my husband works really long shifts so I'm home alone with the animals all day long. Though I love my fur babies they are not much for conversation or motivation. In fact they motivate me to snuggle with them and sleep the day away, but then the bills wouldn't get paid and the house wouldn't be clean. Since I work from home I must get myself out of bed, set a schedule, and stick to it. I walk the dog every day to get me out of the house and make sure I don't wear my pajamas all day long. I look for groups and clubs to join in my area so I can get to know the neighborhood and hopeful make some lasting friendships. Next week I'm going to be in a 5k with a friend I met once at short film where we both volunteered as extras. I can't change where I am. My husband's work is here and this is where we live now, over 16 hours away from my friends of 10 years and 30 hours away from my family. This is it. So I could pout and whine and complain. Or I can search the internet and get involved in something. 

Life isn't always fair, but if we lie down it will continue to hold us because we are allowing it to. So get up! Change your mind set and figure out how to push through, because the other side is going to make you stronger mentally and change your environment for the better. Check out the article above and start making some changes mentally. Start looking at your situations differently and you'll start to see once your mindset is strong you'll be able to reach those goals or that happiness you want so much. But you have to change the way you think and then you need to put those thoughts to action. No one else is going to change the way you think about things. You can though. You can do anything you put your mind to. 

Thanks for reading!

Have a Sweeter Day Than Yesterday!