Pizza Sex Metaphor

Ted Talks:Al Vernacchino

I love Ted Talks! I found them when looking for entrepreneur advice. There are a great deal of Ted Talks that are leadership and business influential. I honestly don't remember my first Ted Talks experience was, but I know I quickly became addicted to them. I love the thoughts and ideas the speakers bring to each of their speeches. They are all extremely different from each, none are alike. I've watched some on self esteem, on entrepreneurship, and now I've seen one on a new metaphor model for sex.

These talks are fascinating and I couldn't help but smile throughout the video. But there were other parts where I went into deep thought, remembering high school and being a confused teen. The speaker, Al Vernacchio, goes over a comparison of the typical Baseball model for sex and his own Pizza metaphor. I remember the boys talking in the halls Monday mornings, "Did you score, man?" I remember hearing girls even speak about the bases, "Really, you let him get to second base?" But there was something that hit me when the speaker claimed the Baseball metaphor implies a competition. Sports are competitive. If our sex metaphor is based off of a sport doesn't that imply that it is a competition as well? Maybe not right away, but for those who are struggling teens trying to be adults, sex suddenly becomes a goal that is a must reach because someone is going to beat you to it.

The speaker talks of how Baseball is a sport, which in some cases someone who is not extremely athletic can already feel singled out. And how talking about it like a sport is pushing teens to think of it as a goal or win once achieved intercourse. Creating a bad taste in some mouths while in other's a taste of how behind am I than everyone else?

The new model or metaphor for Sex should be Pizza the speaker suggests, because everyone loves pizza but you're not always in the mood for it. Perfect! All of a sudden sex isn't a must or goal, it has a time and a place. Pizza is when you are hungry, when you're ready. It's delicious and the toppings change based on the person you are dining with. No more First Base, Second and Third. Now it can be what everyone is comfortable with, and when.

I loved this talk and the idea of it. I plan on teaching it to my kids if and when I have any. The idea is simple and yet it could change a the way teens think about sex. I imagined myself as teen and thinking about the Pizza Metaphor, not only do I think I would have laughed hearing it, but I think I would have been more comfortable with idea of it. Teens are still going to talk about sex, they are still going to pressure one another, and they are still going to have it before they are ready. But the idea of taking your time about it. Especially with someone who shares your likes and dislikes, which also takes time to learn.

What do you think of this new Sex Metaphor? Do you would have thought about sex differently growing up?

Have a Sweeter Day than Yesterday

Daddy's Should Set the Bar High

Okay ladies and gentlemen, a little life lesson from my perspective as a young girl growing up. First let me say this blog is not meant to be judgy, but more my thoughts based on my experiences and what I want for little girls who will eventually become young women. 

I saw the above quote floating around Facebook and I just had to share it. "A daughter needs a Dad to be the standard against which she will judge all men." Which I totally agree. 

Dads get your daughter something sweet.

Growing up my father worked very long hours to provide for our family. He mostly worked in workshops, working with metal and glass molds. This was not a glamorous job as you can imagine, however, he never failed to show up to work on even when he was sick. During this time he also went to college twice! A full time job of 40+ hours a week, full time school schedule and would never except anything less than Dean's List from himself. Now my father did not have time to play tea parties with me and he apologized once to me for not doing more with me growing up. Even though he didn't play pretend or sat through dull tea parties, I do have a couple memories playing hind and seek with my brother and I. And I my most precious moments were sitting on his lap in his recliner watching movies. 

Another father figure in my life was my uncle. He and my father were rather close even though they were not related by blood, but by marriage. A marriage that did not work out mind you. So for years they stayed close and were there for each other. My uncle and my dad worked in the same shop and would hang out often. One thing they together was talk. A lot. And when grew old he and my aunt would sit and talk with me. Something that always sticks in my mind is my uncle saying, "well let me play devil's advocate for a minute." 

My mother met a man and was with this man for 10+ years and in that time I adopted him as anther father figure in my life. Meeting him later in my teens I liked him because he actually made time for my brother and I.  The other men that mother had dated never seemed to bother with my brother and I. Did they pick us up from school when asked? Yes. But they didn't make plans with us. My stepfather took my brother and I to the movies often without my mother. She didn't care for the movies we liked. He also took us to the library. Which was humorous because he didn't like to read. He and my mother would make popcorn and we would have movie nights. I even wrestled with him. He was an ornery man with love for 2 teenagers that were not his own children. I still call him and visit him when I get the chance. 

Now that you've read all this you should be able to guess what my husband is like, right? I met my husband in my senior year of high school. We were both each other's firsts and we have been together for over 9 years now. When we first started dating my husband was the class clown. I loved his humor and the positive energy that radiated off of him. He is also a very hard worker. At the age of 25 he is a market manager doing sales and marketing. 

My husband reminds me of my dad, my uncle, and my stepfather. He works pretty much everyday, cares for his team and works even when we are home. Even though he is a manager now he still continues to research and network with others to learn as much as possible. Understanding that even though he is the boss he doesn't know everything and there is always something to learn to make himself a better leader. 

My husband is also extremely ornery. There are times where his humor doesn't have an off switch. He enjoys making others laugh. There have been times when I'm trying to argue with him and he has one liners that derail me, so I end up smiling while I'm trying to be serious and angry. He is extremely honest and cares for people in a way that when I met him most teenage boys did not. 

When my husband works day after day, for hours and hours and talks to me about someday retiring without worry, he reminds me of my father. When my husband jokes with me and says he's a stud and I say,"Who told you that?" He grins at me and says, "The list would be shorter of who didn't tell me that." He reminds my of my stepdad. When my husband is dealing with an unreasonable person, he tries to stay calm and see it from their point of view. Which reminds me of my uncle.

So my thoughts when I saw that quote on Facebook was immediately how I look at my husband on a daily basis and see the men that were in my life growing up. This is just my opinion, but I feel that a little girl takes a lot from those around her growing. And based on how those people act is how she will treat others as well as how she will have others treat her.

So men and Dad's out there raising a little girl or the next teenage boy, you should probably check your actions. Not to say everyone can stay calm and collected at all times. But there is a point when you are fighting with your wife, arguing with the neighbor, or complaining about going to work when others have things handed to them that you must look at your child and think what are they taking away from my attitude right now. Will this help them to be a better person when they're an adult or will they struggle like I have struggled? Do I want my daughter to date someone like me or have my son treat a young lady like I treat his mother? If the answer to these questions is."YES." Then awesome. Both of my Dad's like my husband and they are pretty funny when they are all hanging out with each other. Ornery men seem to have a lot to talk about. 

Thanks for Reading 

My 

Thoughts 

& 

I Hope you Have 

Sweeter Day

than

Yesterday!